Over the last decade the word “engagement” has been re-packaged, resold an remarketed so that it’s become a buzzword linked with organizational success (we must have engaged employees), customer relationships and social networking (we must be engaged with the customers”, and even, perhaps more sadly, in education. I say sadly because the meaning is unclear, and it’s become the latest fad in many of these fields.

That doesn’t mean it has no value, however, even if it is oversold.

There is one major mistake that often occurs when people talk about engagement. The social networking people are particularly prone to the error as they suggest that companies need to be engaged with their customers, and that social networking platforms are mandatory. Here’s the error.

Engagement (it’s tempting to try to define it, but the truth is it probably has no substantive, definitive agreed upon meaning) is not necessarily bi-directional. Fancy term. What does it mean? It means that I may be engaged in talking to you, but you may NOT be engaged with me, or vice versa. Or, we may be engaged with each other.

In this sense the word is completely different than “engaged to be married” (which is why it’s just a bad use of the word). If you and I are engaged to each other, it IS, definitionally, bi-directional.

Ok. Who cares?

The critical aspect of engagement is whether the OTHER person is engaged, and NOT the businessperson, marketer, teacher, trainer, etc. What I’m seeing, particularly with social networkers and marketers is they assume bidirectionality. So, if John is marketing, and is engaged in a conversation with Mary via Twitter, John assumes Mary is also engaged. That’s false as an assumption. In fact, it’s probably NOT the case.

Of course the same thing can happen in a classroom, and I’ve certainly seen situations where the trainer was engaged with the group, and having a high old time while the group members were not engaged at all.

So, the thing here, the moral is quite simple. If you want a learning result, or a sales result, it doesn’t matter where YOU are at. It matters where your client is at. Never assume engagement on their part just because there is engagement on your part.

Take note, all you marketers. I’ll bet that tens of thousands of social media marketers have discovered that, in general, engagement isn’t happening, and the bottom line is that sales do not increase based on the seller’s level of engagement.